So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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