I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Do you have feelings for this penis?
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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