Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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