What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I need to stop coming to work sober
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
