My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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