he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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