The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
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