So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
