He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
