I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
