LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
