check it out our google latitudes are spooning
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Randomize
