And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Still dying that you shit outside
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
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