Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Randomize
