There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
