Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
