Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
