Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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