So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I am one with the molecules
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
