Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
23 People Confess The Trashiest Thing They’ve Seen In Person
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
19 Transgender People Reveal The First Sign That They Were Trans
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.