I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
worst night to have a conscience
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Randomize