At least make sure they are 18
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Not as such, no.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...