We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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