I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
