Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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