Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
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