oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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