i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize