That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize