forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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