How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize
