I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Randomize