i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Randomize
