and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
