Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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