Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Randomize
