in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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