the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
