your thong is hanging out like whoa
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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