There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
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I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
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I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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