let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize