Buhtt sex?
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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