So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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