so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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