Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize