Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
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