Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
