You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
