My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
