you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
