After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
